Loving the Person You Disagree With

“Love is the only force capable of transforming an enemy into friend.”– Martin Luther King Jr.

It is the season of presidential politics and it is a time that we Americans are forced to endure the insults and verbal abuse that candidates, pundits and media members hurl at each other. Name calling and other vulgar insults have become the norm for all sides of political and religious spectrums. It is America and the world at its worst. I yearn for the days when we could discuss issues of importance, without throwing out insults at one another. On occasion, I have been guilty of succumbing to this behavior. This is a sickness that everyone should all be concerned with. People should never scream or hurl insults at others. Does an insult really better our point of view or does it weaken it? The words we use can destroy a person they can leave them scarred and hurt. Is there really any excuse or justification for poor behavior? These verbal assaults and belittling  have led to increased hatred, division and the most polarized America I can remember.  The world has lost its compassion and empathy for one another. There is never a legitimate excuse to attack people with insults no matter how wrong you might think others are. The church also needs to be on guard against divisive and harmful speech. So how can we affect change?

But no one can tame the tongue; it is a restless evil and full of deadly poison. With it we bless our Lord and Father, and with it we curse men, who have been made in the likeness of God. (James 3:8-9)

We do have hope. Our hope is in God through Jesus. God has made us all in His image. We can learn how to address issues without insulting and attacking people. The Christian is held to a higher standard. God has called us to uphold the sanctity of human life and the human spirit. The scriptures inspire us with that standard. When I  carelessly forget how to treat people here are a few “reminders” that God gives me through His Word.

If someone says, “I love God,” and hates his brother, he is a liar; for the one who does not love his brother whom he has seen, cannot love God whom he has not seen. And this commandment we have from Him, that the one who loves God should love his brother also. (1John 4:20-21)

We need to approach everyone with love. This is not just an instruction to love our family, but it is also a commandment to love the stranger and the politician we can’t stand. If we view every human being as better than ourselves, and love them more than we love ourselves, imagine the incredible changes we could make. It is important that we see everyone around us as God sees them. This has always been a difficult task for me. I can think of occasions in the past when I have failed to show love. God will correct you if you are willing. A loving person immediately apologizes for wrong doing. When we apologize, we also must be prepared to love that person who does not want to forgive us or let the issue go. This is when the follower of Christ asks God for His enduring love. Love is humble and full of God’s grace.

We have come to know and have believed the love which God has for us. God is love, and the one who abides in love abides in God, and God abides in him. (1John 4:16)

We need to approach everyone without pride. God hates pride. Pride can destroy the best of friendships. It can wreck a marriage and undo any good will you might have. Pride always makes you think that your idea or cause is better than anyone else’s. Pride keeps you form looking at it from the other person’s view. We all have opinions but the prideful person will want to silence and insult them. Pride destroys new or better ideas by belittling the person presenting them. The Christian need to be humble and should always address the issues with wisdom; while never attacking the person. It is important to stop attacking people and to stop making issues personal. The constant public chastising of fellow Christians is wrong. (Something I have had to repent over.) When we attack a person, it is always prideful and it is always judgmental. Live always with the reminder of what Jesus did on the cross. Did Jesus lash out at those attacking Him? Jesus always shows mercy and grace to those who do not deserve it.

But you, why do you judge your brother? Or you again, why do you regard your brother with contempt? For we will all stand before the judgment seat of God. (Romans 14:10)

Therefore let us not judge one another anymore, but rather determine this—not to put an obstacle or a stumbling block in a brother’s way. (Romans 14:13)

We need to approach everyone with encouragement. It seems like every comedy show today is nothing but one line zingers insulting someone else on the show followed by a laugh track. Just sit back, and with a spirit of compassion and love, think how those words really feel. It is not so funny when we are on the receiving end of insults. The Christians should always encourage everyone around them. How powerful of an influence would you have with people if you focused on encouragement? The greatest leaders have always been the ones who inspired people to be better, who focused on their strengths. Jesus always encouraged those around Him. We should do the same.

So then we pursue the things which make for peace and the building up of one another. (Romans 14:19)
But encourage one another day after day, as long as it is still called “Today,” so that none of you will be hardened by the deceitfulness of sin. (Hebrew 3:13)

When the issues are something that we are so passionate about, it can cause us to loose focus on how to treat people. It does not matter the discussion or the topic, always keep your eyes on Jesus and his behavior. We should always imitate him. Please remember before you talk to someone always go to God in prayer. The more you pray in preparation for your day the better your behavior will be. It is from God and through  enduring prayer that we learn to love and encourage one another. It is through repentant prayer that God breaks us from a prideful and judgmental heart.

 

 

 

Author: Stephan Caraway

Sinner, Husband, Father, writer and follower of Christ. God knows I am a deeply flawed individual, yet He, Jesus, still loves me.

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